Planning for Safety

Do not tell your abuser you are leaving. It may be difficult, but telling your abuser will increase the likelihood of injury or death.
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If you are able to, make a "go bag." You may need copies of keys, legal documents, medication, money, or a checkbook.
This will allow you to leave in a hurry and have everything you need. If you have a go bag, hide it somewhere your abuser cannot find. Or give it to a trusted friend, family member or neighbor.
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If it is safe, have a code word with your children. If you say a word or phrase, your children will know what to do, or where to go. It is important to only share this plan with your kids if you are positive they will not tell your abuser.
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During violent outbursts, stay away from rooms with weapons or only one exit, like kitchens, garages, or bathrooms.
Keep cash on hand in case you have to leave quickly, and keep at least a quarter of a tank of gas in your car. Try and have copies of your keys hidden in case your abuser takes your keys.
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Create a nonverbal cue you can share with a friend or neighbor. This may mean leaving a porch light on, open/closed curtains, text a code word, or something similar that signals that you need the police or some intervention.

The following items are important to have when you leave, if possible:

• Social security, birth certificates, and other IDs
• Immunization records
• Public assistance cards/Medicaid cards
• Passports, green cards, work permits
• Money, checkbook, ATM cards, credit cards
• Medication and medical supplies
• Keys
• Car registration, insurance papers
• Divorce or separation papers
• Lease, rental agreement or house deed
• Car mortgage payment book
• Children’s toys, security blankets
• Your personal safety plan (if written down)